asshole
so i thought i was in for the usual porny-cum-activisty video clips for my lesbian/gay etc class when my professor turned on the projector.
this middle aged guy pops up sitting in his kitchen, full of bitter rage about the news that he's contracted aids, and his feeling of victimisation by people in society, esp the right wing politicians and their instruments of terror, because he's gay, and according to them, "deserved it". he then says he gave up on preparing his "piece" for this homemade video-like clip, and takes out a gun from the cabinet. he waves it around, says he gave up cos he's been persecuted for his asshole, literally, and to show it literally, he pulls down his pants, turns around, pulls open his butt crack, repeats that he's lived and will die through his asshole, then sticks the gun in there and shoots himself. blood spurts out, his body falls to the ground, and a background voice starts chanting assholeassholesomethingsomething. the video ends with the bloodied body on the ground.
only then does the professor tell us that it's an underground ART performance, not a real dead body.
he follows up with a real life (this time) video journal that this gay couple made to document their relationship and the eventual death of one of them through aids. it's hard-hitting while heart-rendering, aimed at showing that they're human, deviant only because we say so, they love and grieve at loss too. after capturing the (long) moment of death and the ghostly blank stare of the corpse, there's a dance by the couple from earlier times, part of the black humor of their situation.
man, at that point, what with the nausea from the first clip and the gritty reality of suffering in the second, we were just crying, even some of the guys i think.
this was supposed to be my slack class for the semester, not an emotional grinder. it should give me breathing room, not make me feel like i'm choking from the cold sunlight.
now how do i translate this mere affectation of feeling into something coherent that can shed light on the issues brought up?
heh just a taste of classes over here for you guys.
this middle aged guy pops up sitting in his kitchen, full of bitter rage about the news that he's contracted aids, and his feeling of victimisation by people in society, esp the right wing politicians and their instruments of terror, because he's gay, and according to them, "deserved it". he then says he gave up on preparing his "piece" for this homemade video-like clip, and takes out a gun from the cabinet. he waves it around, says he gave up cos he's been persecuted for his asshole, literally, and to show it literally, he pulls down his pants, turns around, pulls open his butt crack, repeats that he's lived and will die through his asshole, then sticks the gun in there and shoots himself. blood spurts out, his body falls to the ground, and a background voice starts chanting assholeassholesomethingsomething. the video ends with the bloodied body on the ground.
only then does the professor tell us that it's an underground ART performance, not a real dead body.
he follows up with a real life (this time) video journal that this gay couple made to document their relationship and the eventual death of one of them through aids. it's hard-hitting while heart-rendering, aimed at showing that they're human, deviant only because we say so, they love and grieve at loss too. after capturing the (long) moment of death and the ghostly blank stare of the corpse, there's a dance by the couple from earlier times, part of the black humor of their situation.
man, at that point, what with the nausea from the first clip and the gritty reality of suffering in the second, we were just crying, even some of the guys i think.
this was supposed to be my slack class for the semester, not an emotional grinder. it should give me breathing room, not make me feel like i'm choking from the cold sunlight.
now how do i translate this mere affectation of feeling into something coherent that can shed light on the issues brought up?
heh just a taste of classes over here for you guys.
posted by chiminychim @ 12:38 PM
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