eternal sunshine

there is more to life, chimpy, im sure of that! its just how you find it, when you find it, and what you make of it! dont let your moods get you down gal =) its like how your life seems like a blast to me and i think how shitty my life is here.. but then i think again, and its not all that bad, and i will walk out whatever path i've chosen anyway. think: eternal sunshine of the spotless mind. (heh im waiting for the end of my exams to watch the dvd!)
hah what optimism coming from me, considering how disillusioned i am at the moment! very extremely so with church, that i blurted out to my brother that church is one big evil scheme- and he asked if i was implying god is evil ( shesh.) so i said no, god is good, church is evil. its the instituition, not the god. and i was reminded that this was the very distinction jean was always trying to make me see. sigh. i wonder if its my rebellious nature making me behave like a petulant child refusing to go to school. but there is no satisfaction in going, and i dont want to make going to church a 'for the people' thing. i feel very guilty about it, no thanks to them trying to guilt-trip me as well- even using a kid as a trump card grrh!
my semester has flown by me, i have one last paper in 4 days' time. how fast time has gone by, i can hardly believe it. i miss you guys terribly, very acutely felt when i was freaking out while mugging- chim and jo, you guys were no longer an sms or a phone call away, but a world apart, and worlds apart in terms of our lives now. so i swallowed my fear and mugged on. this sem has been mostly about learning to be independent, and i am stronger than before (think britney spears!) heh.
so keep going you guys =) send me your addresses ok, my msn email add is fine. will send you cards at least for xmas la, since you're not hauling your lazy asses back! =( if you have any special requests like chilli sauce or whatever just say it ok. and do tell me your lovely travel plans ( apart from llama-land chim) and when you're going.
take care and may (your respective) good gods bless you!