just to set the record straight my lie last night at senior's dinner was a COMPLETE lie, no truth in any sense, so thank you if you voted believing in my integrity, but thank you even more for the starbucks voucher =) no lies about my gratitude here

tried to upload photos but the browser shut me down, my roommate's in a weepy mess and this means donut time. how do you convince her that life's worth living, and worse, how do you answer her never-ending qn of why she was born a girl?!?! with donuts, buttermilk, glazed, chocolate, custard, cinnamon hello fats goodbye tears

in case i forget when people bully me, i really love everyone here at berkeley, from my 5 "brothers" -morriszhenyuyongheyashdhanwilson- who provide a lot of entertainment, sometimes at my expense and who as i told fuzzy keep me sane because when i'm with americans i question myself so much that i'm afraid of losing everything; to my roommate who's indescribable in her warmth and energy and who just osmosises me into her life, frat and all, to my neighbor who has prevented me from washing my sheets for months cos he rolls around in my bed every morning/afternoon/night and hits me with my pillow and who parades his body in front of us, i regret slapping him last yr, but maybe it drew the boundaries that i need, to theo and morgan and alex on my floor for their hugs and sweets and cookies and for turning off my light and making me go to bed when i snooze with a book, even to the girl on my floor with the sourest face in the world, i guess you made me a bit tougher with your un-friendliness heh.
so these are the people i've come to regard as "family" i guess

then there're the tutoring people, thanks to ms sarah and all the little kids who made my last session heartbreakingly sweet; Jennifer, my potentially lesbian classmate (is it weird if a girlfriend says "how do we maintain our relationship over summer??) for our weekly lunch cum whining about the world and chinese history, Rebecca for telling me her exploits with guys 1o yrs older than her over lunch and our unfated lunch meetings; and to the model un people whom i'm just starting to know, to the serious people thanks for showing me how to be professional, to the cock ones heh they make my time at meetings worthwhile (i'll be a good treasurer...just ask my dad i always get money out of him), finally to people here and there who as this guy told me seem like your best friend when they first meet you cos they're so friendly (and who then told me his bloody life story in growing up in america as a japanese even though i just met him)

yes thank you everyone especially the assorted bums and gangs of punks prowling the streets of berkeley for making me weirder than i am already.

sorry, sentimental cos freshman yr's ending. and my roommate makes me feel weepy too. angst! now to convince her that being alive and a girl is not too bad a thing.